Washington, D.C. - The FDA issued a warning today over certain food products sold in the United States potentially being contaminated with evil, some of which may be pure and fully concentrated. A team of FDA inspectors, shown here testing a cauldron for any traces of evil "We can't say for certain which products may have been contaminated," acting FDA Commissioner Kyle Diamantas explained. "The office that handled this kind of thing was shut down last year. But what I can te

Hollywood, CA - Hot off of the success of Obsession, the surprise blockbuster released earlier this year that has grossed more than $500 million on a $750,000 budget, American filmmaker Curry Barker has revealed plans for a survival thriller film based on Jessica McClure, popularized as "Baby Jessica", and the events surrounding her becoming trapped in a well on October 14, 1987. President George H. W. Bush, who has denied any involvement, shown here laughing with Baby Jessic

Studio City, CA - Hallmark Channel, the American cable television network owned by the Hallmark Cards subsidiary Hallmark Media, has announced plans for a complete transition to AI-generated movies and series in 2027. A Hallmark AI filmmaker, shown here fine tuning a photorealistic avatar of Lacey Chabert for season 14 of The Heart What Beckons "Hallmark is known for our romantic comedy, light romance, and mystery programming," Hallmark Media President Darren Abbott explained