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Writer's pictureZoo Knudsen

Scientists Around the World Baffled by New Research, One of Them Says

Updated: 3 days ago

Harvard area, MA - New research performed near Harvard is baffling scientists all over the world according to one of them.


Scientist Steve, shown here smiling in his science lab and probably about to say something really funny. Classic Steve!

"I have to be honest and admit that none of us saw this coming...at all," Merrill Worcester explained. "Not even Steve. He was all like, "What...no way. Now that's a spicy meatball!" That's like Steve's catchphrase, and he does this stupid voice. Steve is hilarious."


One of the most important aspects of high quality science is replication. A single result can be an outlier and should only rarely be the final word. Even the most dedicated scientist can make a mistake or be influenced by belief and bias, and some unusual findings can even come about based on chance alone. Which is why it's so weird that all these scientists are so confused by the whole thing.


After taking some time to process the study's unexpected results, the research team is back at work on a new project aimed at replicating or falsifying them so that everyone will just chill the fuck out. According to Worcester, It's important to keep moving forward and to avoid being distracted by research that catches you off guard. "We are professional scientists and a fundamental aspect of what we do is...Steve, stop it! I'm talking to that reporter about the study. I know, right? That was nuts!"


Not all research is the same. There are varying degrees of quality and some takes place far away from academic research facilities like Harvard, or even the warehouse that stores the servers for the Online Correspondence College of Tampa. Though she admits that skepticism is always the appropriate response to unexpected findings, Worcester is also quick to point out the proximity of her science lab to Harvard. "We are very close. In fact, if you look between those two buildings over there...yep, that's the on-ramp to the interstate and then it's just like 10 minutes to the campus. 45 with traffic."

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